why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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