Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
