You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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