He disabled his match.com account in front of me
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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