I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
