Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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