i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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