apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
