"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
