first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I need a burrito and a hug.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
