You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
