Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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