that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
