Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
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