It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
