The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
