you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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