the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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