you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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