This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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