Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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