it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
