I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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