Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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