I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
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