he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
