yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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