I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
