new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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