Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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