I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
