Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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