I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
