I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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