We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
