If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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