What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
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