My room smells like vodka and shame
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
