thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
