she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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