I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
