Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
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