Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
