im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
this is an emotional support booty call
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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