Is it normal to miss your booty call?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
