are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Randomize
