bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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