Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
My day in three words: secret purse cake
my poor anus
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
