You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
