I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I have aggressive nipples.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
